Been quite some time since I've written here. I've read my Ub3rmems quite a bit in the 8 months that have passed.
Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I had a personal driver. My chauffeur who I could speak to, someone who would be impartial to my agony and my stress. As I stated in a previous post, I truly believe people talk to their Uber drivers with such confidence because of the anonymity of the dynamic. You can have an intense 5-minute conversation about the way your boyfriend just doesn't understand that sex is more than just "take my dick out and suck it before I fuck you." You can even find yourself in LA traffic, spending 45 minutes on a 7 mile one way trip. If you're lucky, the 45 minutes will fly by because you'll get to talk about how shitty this city is getting, how populated the streets feel, and how you can't wait to move out of the City of Angels.
You can basically at anything. You can literally just sit there and speak your mind with someone who has no deep connection to you, apart from the fact your fare is helping them pay for their dog food, or tuna, or probably the same beer they drank a few minutes before getting dispatched for your ride.
I don't spend much time taking rides from people, as driving is something I love. I'm usually the Captain of the ship, steering across an endless valley of pavement. Shifting through gears and driving gives you a sense of control. Next time you drive, try and place your phone down for a little bit. The texts can wait. You'll survive. I promise.
Look around at the people next to you. They're probably just as miserable as you are. Or probably just as happy as you are. Their energy is basically a reflection of yours. If you're fortunate enough to make eye contact, you'll probably freak them out a little. Why? Because the human gaze carries a path into a deeper sense of self.
"So what's the point of that, Crenshaw?"
The same way you're more comfortable talking to someone over the phone than you are in person, Ub3r memories allow you to not look the person in the eye yet you can tell them what you can't tell your wife or husband or what couldn't tell them before you became a widow.
The backseat provides that opportunity. The backseat I'm sitting on now as I'm writing this provides me the opportunity to have a private moment looking out into the Mojave Preserve. It feels different not being the ship leader.
I took a Lyft ride one time. I was stuck over in Long Beach at a perimeter of an Officer Involved Shooting. I needed to get over to Coyote Diagonal and was on Cherry/4th Street.
The ride was a bit awkward to say the least. Lyft, unless Uber, highly recommends that riders ride up front. Uber on the other hand is impartial on this philosophy. So, when in Rome, I went ahead and sat up front.
The driver wasn't too responsive to my conversation, which may have been due to the fact I told her I was an Uber driver as well.
She reminded me of a barber who runs out of things to say and just starts asking you the same question he asked the last time you sat on that barber chair.
She was nice though.
$12.50 for a 4 mile ride.
Eye contact shows confidence and respect, but it can also show trust and intrigue. When two lovers reach climax together and stare into each other's eyes in the moment, they feel something they usually don't.
But if you reach climax without eye contact, the feeling is much different.
Just do us a favor: don't climax the next time you take an Uber, unless you make eye contact.
- Crenshaw
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